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• Possibly Apocalypse
• "How We Can Get Back on Our Feet & Other Shoe Salesman Philosophies"
• "Why Man Walks Erect, and Other Stories of Man's Insatiable Sexual Desires"
• "Life Changed When My Girlfriend Got Nails & How and Why it Happened"
• "What the Telegraph Did for the Bird
• "Ground Zero: The End in Context"
• "@3am We All Will Die"
• "The Great Expedition to Nowhere in Particular, and The Hurry They Were In To Get There."
• "The President, Patriotism, And the Subsequent War"

• id, ego, superego, eggo, supereggo, and cinammaon eggo.
• "Such a Bohr!"
• E.T. : "Phone Ohm"
• Reason for evil of Man : God lost human race in a poker game.
• Would the Chicks still dig me if I ate their mothers at KFC?

Unrestrained Passion, Grueling Stamina, and Wild Abandon --> Architecture.

Vanilla Ice --> Snow --> Slush?

stuffed animals with tags --> mattresses with tags.

On Politics, Business, Religion and Other Odd Hobbies of Mankind

On Creativity, Thought, and Imagination

Writing and Other Expressions

On Men, Women, Life and Beauty

From Poetry (and Prose)

From Worth magazine 4/5/92

• Dollar Rent-A-Car's "Dollar Bill of Rights"
• Budget Rent-A-Car's "Budget Budget Deficit"
• New York Times First Amendment
• Smith & Wesson Second Amendment
• Motel 6 Third Amendment
• Jack Daniel's Fifth Amendment
• Circle K Congress
• Hormel Habeas Corpus
• Rolaids Congressional Medal of Honor
• John Hancock Declaration of Independence
• Quaker Oath of Office
• Pledge's "Pledge of Allegiance"

• Crumbledown Economics : rich throw crumbs down to the poor.
• Laissez-Fairy Tale

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  On Creativity, Thought, and Imagination

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  "Inspiration may be the revelation of something completely new, but it is also the rediscovery of something always true." Robert Grudin

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  "Our heads are crowded with ideas and associations in a way that may be likened to a random card index file, voluminous and untidy, but cross-referenced way down into the subconscious." Eugene Raskin

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  "Inventive people live with an absurd but indispensable trust that the next idea that comes to them may be totally new." Robert Grudin

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  "...There is something quietly suicidal about destroying the work of one's own hands." Robert Grudin

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  "In a society of technicians and entreprenuers, of consumers protected qually from nuclear disaster and body odor, there is little room for tragic vision." Robert Grudin

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  "What takes root in my oragamibrain?" Einsturzende Neubauten

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  Writing and Other Expressions

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  "I write because it is the only was I am willing to survive." William Styron

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  On Men, Women, Life and Beauty

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  "There are many wise men, but on the other hand, not one stupid tree." Paavo Haa Vikko

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  "...From this point of view, Beauty oddly resembles gravity: like gravity, beauty is a force whose existence is inferred from apparent effects." Robert Grudin

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  "Know yourself. Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful." Ann Landers

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  "Nothing can keep an argument going like two persons who aren't sure what they're arguing about." O.A. Battista

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  "Throughout history, admission to Hell depended on one criterion...you must belong to a group some other group believes is heading there." James Morrow

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  "Oh well, we vomit and move on to the next meal." Lorena Ho

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  "To be truly open to any experience, the mind must be open to all." Robert Grudin

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  "I am somehow less interested in the weight and convolutions of Einstein's brain than in the near certainty that people of equal talent have lived and died in cotton fields and sweatshops."

  Stephen J. Gould :The Panda's Thumb

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  "There is no difference between being raped and being run over by a truck except that afterwards men ask if you enjoyed it."

  Marge Piery : "Rape Poem"

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  "It's no use trying to pretend that mostpeople and ourselves are alike. Mostpeople have less in common with ourselves than the squarerootofminusone. You and I are human beings; most people are snobs."

  e.e. cummings : into to Collected Poems

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  "The two of them were innocent. Everyone was innocent. The universe was a place of blameless urges and morally neutral hyrdraulics."

  James Morrow : Only Begotten Daughter

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  From Poetry (and Prose)

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  "This is the long tunnel
  of wanting you."
  Erica Jong : "The Long Tunnel of Wanting You"

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  "there are so many little dyings that it doesn't matter which of

  them is death."
  Kenneth Patchen : "And What With the Blunders"

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  "What did training bras train
  breasts to do?"
  Alice Fulton : "Cherry Bombs"

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  "I see the monuments
  I near the rest of my life.
  I Take what's left of Picasso's hand."

  Clark Coolidge : "Paris..."

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  "For all those whose beauty
  stirred their torturers to fury;
  & for all those whose ugliness did the same."
  Erica Jong : "For All Those Who Died"

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  "...for life's not a paragraph
  and death, i think, is no parenthesis."
  e.e. cummings : "since feeling is first"

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  "My husband gives me an A
  for last nights supper,
  an incomplete for my ironing,
  a B+ in bed.
  my son says I am average,
  an average mother, but if
  I put my mind to it
  I could improve.
  my daughter believes
  in pass/fail and tells me
  I pass. wait until they learn
  I'm dropping out."
  Linda Pastan : "The Five Stages of Grief Poems"

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  "And how much courage it requires to get up in the
  morning and dress yourself. Nobody congratulates
  you!"
  Franz Wright : "Entry In An Unknown Hand"

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  "I was the poet
  of shadow work and towns with quarter-inch
  phonebooks..."
  C.D. Wright : "Our Dust"

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  "...Only an actual randomness
  never admits a mistake."
  Douglas Crase : "True Solar Holiday"

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  "These are, as I began, cumbersome ways
  to kill a man. Simpler, direct, and much more neat
  is to see that he is living somewhere in the middle
  of the twentieth century and leave him there."
  Edwin Brock : "five ways to kill a man"

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  "...fishing
  for her voice in a deep mirrorless pond..
  ...(brighter than pennies in water & more wished upon)."
  Erica Jong : "His Tuning of the Night"

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  "I'll make a perfect body, said God,
  and invent ways to make it fail."
  Stephen Dunn : "Letting the Puma Go"

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  "Love is a softness
  the weak cannot afford,
  & sex a Darwinian bribe."
  Erica Jong : "The Death of Goddesses"

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  "But I'd say
  you must die a little,
  have a book of matches go off in your hand,
  see your best friend copying off your exam,
  visit an Indian reservation and see
  their plastic feathers,
  the dead dreams."
  Anne Sexton : "The Evil Seekers"

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  "It's under my skin but out of my hands,
  I'll tear it apart but won't understand.
  I will not accept the greatness of man."
  Tears for Fears : "Woman In Chains"

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  "You see,
  It's not that I don't have an identity,
  The problem is I have too many."
  Barbara Anderson : "Deuce 12:23am"

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  "Sleep is also the only place I can type with more than three
  Fingers..."
  Mark Cox : "The Word"

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  "Evolution is magical but devoid of heroes.
  You can't say to your child
  Evolution loves you.
  The story stinks
  Of extinction and nothing
  Exciting happns for centuries."
  Stephen Dunn : "At the Smithville Methodist Church"

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  "Appear with a flashlight
  so the stars will not get tired."
  Anne Sexton : "O Ye Tongues"

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  "Beware of tall people
  They will go mad."
  Anne Sexton : "The Sermon of the 12 Acknowledgements"

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  My Own Quotes

  or never know what nonsense today will be truth tomorrow

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  "Why should someone spend their time doing this, and how can I be just like him(them)?"

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  "For writers, rain sometimes falls upwards."

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  "Memories don't ferment, they figment."

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  "I'm building a fuckin' Utopia and I'm burning it to the ground."

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  Matte Elsbernd - melsbern@tuba.aix.calpoly.edu